fax your resume straight to the trash.

the past few days I have been pondering.  Thoughts of God and how he gives gifts.  when I worked in Windsor, my boss was my preacher's wife, and her dad was a pastor too, Hope would always say her daddy would tell her to pray Matthew 21:22..."If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer"  I don't know how many times I think of those words and when I just doubt that change will come, or that God will move mountains, I begin to pray this verse and peace comes and we wait for His timing.

The thought hit me, we ask for things we think we deserve, you know they are rightfully ours, when they are not- they are gifts from God.  Have you ever applied for a job, after your interview you just knew you had it.  I handed my resume to a principal one time and he told me I was "homegrown" and didn't get the job.  WHAT? Didn't get the job I was homegrown- you couldn't find a resume more diversified and exciting as mine....look I deserve this job-I have the degree, the license, the background-- give it to me.   I don't know about you guys, but sometimes I want to show God my religion resume and say now give me want I want.  Look God, I have blessed my meals, gone to church, I have went to the bible study, I have volunteered to help the poor and needy, don't you see its right here under "education" and "volunteer experience" what more can I do?  But just as I get whiny, God says he can care less about my resume, he wants me to take a look at his....because he is the one who will do the work, He is the One. 

God has moved so much over the past few years.  Just when I begin to doubt I take a look over my journals and see where he has moved.  I see the prayers that I have believed and he has been faithful to answer, I see my other prayers and burdens answered in heaven that are not yet seen here on earth and give praise that He will move in them too! 
oh my i really need to get in the bed.  Good night!

life.

life is a funny thing.  we wish it away, then look back to wonder where the days went.  never content in where we are, who we are, but always wishing we can be who we aren't because of who we were yesterday.  I was clearning my memory cards of pictures I had taken....the past year well documented.  days and moments of time wishing we would be where we are today, yet today is here and we are wanting tomorrow- but all we have is today. Think of all the life we could live if we just lived it for today, not dragging yesterday into it, and not pushing it into tomorrow.  Imagine the love we could share if we actually took the time to look into their eyes, imagine the lives we could impact if we actually did something for others and not just talk about it. 

this is one aspect of my life I have been convicted in, the internet has been one major hindrance for me.  Yes it is a great tool, but too much of my time is spent checking email-keeping up with a facebook account- blogging when I get an opportunity.  It robs me of time I could just spend loving my husband who is in front of me, reading my bible instead of a newsfeed, doing a craft instead of reading about them.  I have no trouble fasting food-  I can go without eating, but take my internet away and I start to fidget.  So with that being said, I am withdrawing myself from the world wide web except for time of work and time at school.  We are cancelling our home internet :) 

our life is but a vapor.
later folks!

Well I have some reflections about the word Do...I will admit that sometimes I struggle with this word.  My earthly flesh says, I have a 4 year degree I should be doing something more with my life than changing baby diapers for almost minimal wage.  I have always loved babies and still do, but I guess when I graduated high school I never aspired to go to college and get a job at a daycare.  What I did aspire to do was to be where God would have me be doing what He would have me do, i just never thought it would be that.  But twice in my life I have prayed for a job to be sent to me, and bada bing bada boom...daycare infant room both times.  As much as my flesh beats me up over it at times, my spirit is at peace.  God provided every job I have had- the bank, the biotechnology lab, substitute teaching, daycare, church, and everytime I learn something more of Him.  I would say that daycare has been the most humbling, afterall just the pay alone will humble you, infact I made more money per hour at 2 different jobs with a high school diploma than I do today with a degree. 

but i lack no good thing. 

There are 2 verses that have kept me over the past 2 1/2 years:

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will recieive an inheritance form the Lord as a reward.  It is the Lord Christ you are serving.  Colossians 3:23-24.

Do everything in love. 1 Corinthians 16:14

So over the past 2 1/2 years I have rocked, prayed for,  fed, burped, changed diapers and clothes, played with, tickled, laughed with and on somedays could have really cried with just over 30 babies and toddlers and this only includes daycare- not children's minstry at foster street.  there have been a lot of days I have to keep reminding myself that I am serving Christ not man, especially on days they keep piling things on my "to do list" and "make sure you"....list.  So where and what does the future hold, I cannot say, but I can say that God is Good and one day when I have babies of my own- I will know what products are good to use haha.   
   Brandon shared this song with me this evening...click on the link and take a listen to it.  It helped to remind me of this verse :)

http://stevencurtischapman.com/

if i were confident enough.

I have always thought if I were confident..or brave...or got a wild hair...i really don't know how to word this...other than If I could I  would be a hippie.  full fledge...okay i would shave my legs and armpits...wear my deoderant...and brush my teeth...so possile be a half fledge  hippie.  o and I wouldn't do drugs.  The things I would want is the dreads and the nose ring...and maybe a small tatoo behind my ear on my neck..the music...and the van.  I would be a beach surfer hippie- yes I would know how to surf. I think I would make little necklaces and other random artwork and sell it at a little stand on the beach.. I could open a little shop for families to get their family portraits made on the beach and in an hour come by to pick up the narly CD and I can just hear the parents tell their kids oneday they better not turn out looking like me.... this would be in the summer...in the winter I would drive my van to the mountains and spend my time teaching newbies how to ski- yes I would know to snow ski and snow board like no mans business...my dreads would keep my head warm wrapped tightly in my handmade knit tobaggin with socks mismatched to match.  I would be quiet and think alot and have a cause to protect...maybe its because I am anti-consumerism but surviving in a commerical market, or maybe its just to say peace out man. 

anywho...I have always wondered if I am the only one who has these thought through my head.  Brandon said he would like to see inside my head to see my thoughts.  but I love myself- me.  and even if I tried I would never be a hippie even if I tried my hardest to pull the look off. the real lynn- could possibly do the dreads- but I hear they stink so I would probably gag if they did, the nose ring and tatoo just sound too painful, and I don't like physical pain, music is a definite...the van is a possiblity- I saw one at a yard sale not so long ago.  but what bank wants to do a carloan on a 30 year old vehicle?  Surf/Ski- I am afraid of the waves and possible rip currents, and I don't veer to far from the bunny slope.  I fell down going upwards on teh conveyer belt..cmon. I would buy all the supplies to make my "artwork" to sell and then get bored with the first 3 and never sell them I would probably give them away as gifts.  but hey I can stand for a cause and its the only cause I know- that God made me, He loves me, and Jesus loved me so much he died for me, he rose again and now I can live a life better than one I could ever dream of.  so I love me too.  and it makes me want to love you.  So blogspot readers in case you didn't know.  I love you.

what to blog....what to blog

well here lately our life has been in the fast lane.  The past year has went by extremely fast.  so  here it is our 3rd wedding anniversary, and thus a vacation.  Each year we have taken this week off to chill out and enjoy each others company without rushing here or there.  Today was awesome- with a sewing gift from my B and flowers, we headed to raleigh in the jeep to my favorite store- Peace Camera.  then we took grady to the pond while I ate herseys chocolate icecream and played with my new lens. the rest of the week will be time at the lake and time spent working on the house.  Days of rest with each other are the best!  now for popcorn and tv!  I have been looking at my wedding album here lately because of a few weddings I have been asked to photograph.  I remember how much fun it was to plan and to experience.  I was not a bridezilla and as long as I left that beach lynn king baker I was okay if it poured rain, the cake melted, and the seagulls pooped on my head. 

regrets.

Okay folks, I try to live my life with as little regret as possible- although I don't think we know what we will regret until we have to regret it if that makes any sense.  But I do have one regret....that I didn't go see THE LION KING when it was in Durham.  I looked at tickets and they were going to be like expensive and well I am tight.  Just take a preview of this movie-- this would have been something to see- the people moving and in costume with the animals.  This is also my FAVORITE SONG and FAVORITE part of the whole movie.

If I do recall correctly- I sang this part for my Spanish class back in high school.  Even the teacher Sr. Cowan would request for me to do it again.  Hey what can I say...i'm that good haha.

When I was a kid my favorite movie was the Lion King and the Little Mermaid...I had the t-shirts anyways.  But in both of them I loved the vivid colors and moving music.   and pumba and timon were of course hilarious!  I still laugh at them.  I would always fast foward it through Mufassah's death and the fighting scene at the end....I just liked the good moments of the movie.  I didn't like watching Ursula either- when she first gets Ariel into her sea cave and all those people look like worms trying to get out.....

I think this is where my first love of Seagulls came about. 

I think now of people I know today that are just like these poor souls but instead of Ursula having them in bondage, they are held captive by Satan. 

both of these movies...and Milo and Otis were 3 movies that shaped my childhood.  The ongoing battle of good and evil and the Good always ended with the Victory. I am so glad that God has already won the victory for me and you.  

the lyrics of The circle of life...

just think about how much this means...

From the day we arrive on the planet
And blinking, step into the sun
There's more to see than can ever be seen
More to do than can ever be done
There's far too much to take in here
More to find than can ever be found
But the sun rolling high
Through the sapphire sky
Keeps great and small on the endless round
Sometimes when I am bored, or just think i've got life all figured out this song will come across my mind...and God made this world, this earthly world so awesome and in detail that if I were to try to expose myself to every wonderful part until the day I die- there would still be more left uncovered. 

slight confession

I have a confession to make about an addiction....well thats a really strong word...eh....more of a fetish.  yes a fetish that is what we will call it- with something.  well not just anything...but something I have grown to like and like a weed has overtaken.  and that thing is...is well...fabric.  I know...I know its not shoes....its not clothes...or something productive like cleaning. ha. but its a little something in this life that makes me smile. 

B always makes fun of me, because its not just any fabric but its fabric on sale....scraplings i call them from hobby lobby...I LOVE to look through the fabric that was cut away and just isn't enough to make much.  I am super in love with it if its a pattern out front...and then go to my little 4 shelves and find a piece of it there...on sale...and like 1.97 

What do I do with the fabric...eh make baby bibs in my not so often spare time...and I dream big plans for the fabric, but just haven't yet put it to use haha, other than collecting them.  

I would really like to go through a lot of OLD fabric.  I bought this piece of fabric @ the liberty antiques festival...paid a pretty penny for it, but my plans are to make pillow slipcovers....or a simple small curtain...or something else out of it.  But the fabric use to be old feed/seed bags, or flour sacks.  I fell in love with the cover and pattern...

I have a project plan to sew together an apron to hold my clothes pins when I can finally hang clothes out on a line outside when our house is ever done.  I like aprons for some reason, I have bought 2 and never used them...rarely use them...but I think they are cool.