regrets.

Okay folks, I try to live my life with as little regret as possible- although I don't think we know what we will regret until we have to regret it if that makes any sense.  But I do have one regret....that I didn't go see THE LION KING when it was in Durham.  I looked at tickets and they were going to be like expensive and well I am tight.  Just take a preview of this movie-- this would have been something to see- the people moving and in costume with the animals.  This is also my FAVORITE SONG and FAVORITE part of the whole movie.

If I do recall correctly- I sang this part for my Spanish class back in high school.  Even the teacher Sr. Cowan would request for me to do it again.  Hey what can I say...i'm that good haha.

When I was a kid my favorite movie was the Lion King and the Little Mermaid...I had the t-shirts anyways.  But in both of them I loved the vivid colors and moving music.   and pumba and timon were of course hilarious!  I still laugh at them.  I would always fast foward it through Mufassah's death and the fighting scene at the end....I just liked the good moments of the movie.  I didn't like watching Ursula either- when she first gets Ariel into her sea cave and all those people look like worms trying to get out.....

I think this is where my first love of Seagulls came about. 

I think now of people I know today that are just like these poor souls but instead of Ursula having them in bondage, they are held captive by Satan. 

both of these movies...and Milo and Otis were 3 movies that shaped my childhood.  The ongoing battle of good and evil and the Good always ended with the Victory. I am so glad that God has already won the victory for me and you.  

the lyrics of The circle of life...

just think about how much this means...

From the day we arrive on the planet
And blinking, step into the sun
There's more to see than can ever be seen
More to do than can ever be done
There's far too much to take in here
More to find than can ever be found
But the sun rolling high
Through the sapphire sky
Keeps great and small on the endless round
Sometimes when I am bored, or just think i've got life all figured out this song will come across my mind...and God made this world, this earthly world so awesome and in detail that if I were to try to expose myself to every wonderful part until the day I die- there would still be more left uncovered. 

slight confession

I have a confession to make about an addiction....well thats a really strong word...eh....more of a fetish.  yes a fetish that is what we will call it- with something.  well not just anything...but something I have grown to like and like a weed has overtaken.  and that thing is...is well...fabric.  I know...I know its not shoes....its not clothes...or something productive like cleaning. ha. but its a little something in this life that makes me smile. 

B always makes fun of me, because its not just any fabric but its fabric on sale....scraplings i call them from hobby lobby...I LOVE to look through the fabric that was cut away and just isn't enough to make much.  I am super in love with it if its a pattern out front...and then go to my little 4 shelves and find a piece of it there...on sale...and like 1.97 

What do I do with the fabric...eh make baby bibs in my not so often spare time...and I dream big plans for the fabric, but just haven't yet put it to use haha, other than collecting them.  

I would really like to go through a lot of OLD fabric.  I bought this piece of fabric @ the liberty antiques festival...paid a pretty penny for it, but my plans are to make pillow slipcovers....or a simple small curtain...or something else out of it.  But the fabric use to be old feed/seed bags, or flour sacks.  I fell in love with the cover and pattern...

I have a project plan to sew together an apron to hold my clothes pins when I can finally hang clothes out on a line outside when our house is ever done.  I like aprons for some reason, I have bought 2 and never used them...rarely use them...but I think they are cool.  

afraid of falling

I was watching my kids at work play this past week.  I work with infants and toddlers and the one thing they do really well is falling.  Sometimes when they fall they get hurt- a scrape on their arm, or a bump on their forehead but most of the time all it takes is picking them up and dusting them off.  It made me think of a time that I remember as a child wondering when I would stop falling and when I became afraid of falling. 

Most likey it was late elementary school when I though, hm...I haven't fell down in a while I am getting pretty good at this walking thing...and it wasn't long after that the fear of falling began.

 I remember around my middle school years walking on a railroad truss over a river with my dad.  We made it to the middle and I remember having a fear of falling, or my foot slipping between the large gaps in the ties that shown the river below.  I held on to my dads arm like I hadn't done in years, but the feeling was euphoric when we made it back to the solid ground.

I remember riding horses and never having a fear of falling off.  I had such a trust of the horse and a love for riding that no matter if I did fall I would have gotten right back on.  In fact, I remember when we were breaking my horse Hope to ride she had started out so good.  We decided to take a quick ride I had my shorts on my parents were walking behind.  We made it almost to the barn with a horsefly bite me on the leg.  I went to get it off when it spooked Hope and she bucked.  Before I knew it I had hit the ground.  My dad asked if I was okay, went and got the horse and had me get right back on.  "For the horse" so she would know that wasn't going to happend everytime we came back to the barn, but in hindsight it was really for me.  As I have gotten older I havent' had the time to devote to riding who knows maybe the fear of falling that keep me grounded. 

What is it about falling that adults don't like.  For elderly there is a major fear of falling- falling results in broken bones away from phones to call for help.  But for us who are prime, why do we have such a fear of falling, maybe not literally falling, but showing our weakness. 

I will admit I do not like to show my weakness'.  I find when I am in the Word daily and in prayer daily- falling isn't on my mind.  My arms are wrapped tightly around my father's arm, daddy's nearby to dust me off and help me back up again.  He takes my weakness and shows how strong he really is and that his strength is now mine. 

However life gets crazy busy right- I mean who takes time to read their bible everyday, much less keep the words written on our hearts, who has time to pray besides the one fastly and visually seen at McDonalds so all will know our food is blessed.  Your burger is just a burger...my burger and fries are blessed.  This is where fear sets in its mildest form.  

A lot of my fears now are of  being still and letting God do the movement.  2 years ago when we moved back home, we said we wanted to continue our  peaceful lives of enjoying the day, enjoying God, and enjoying each other- I only kept a planner to keep up with B's days off when we lived in Windsor.  We decided we wanted this to continue and our lives would not be scheduled to death.  just 2 short years later I have my planner slap full.  I have friends I schedule months in advance to hang out with and even then cannot "commit" to that date.  Our falling fear is now a fear of being still and the silence is deafening.  But I think the definition of "living" in asheboro is much different than it was for "living" in Windsor for us.  When I wake up in the morning, I just lie in bed as still as I can be, and listen to the silence.  I know its the last 5 minutes of my day that are a solace, a time to be still, the rest of the day stays in motion. 

1. Living- Verb Most commonly used in larger cities/towns where living is defined by "doing" or "going". 
2. Living- Verb  Most commonly used in slower paced towns in which living is defined by "being"

--so thankful my God is there to pick me up dust me off and just let me Be who he is molding me to Be, to be still before him and know that He is in ever motion even when I cannot see it. 

"O give thanks unto the Lord; call upon His name; make known His deeds among the people.  Sing until Him, sing psalms unto Him; talk ye of all His wondrous works.  Glory ye in His holy name; let the heart of them rejoice that seek the Lord." Ps. 105:1-3

dog turds

today I shovelled out poop from Grady's lot (rarely do I ever do this).  the turds were huge and there were a lot of them, just so you know.  Grady gets really upset...well excited...i really don't know what emotions he has, but he doesn't like it when you take the poop out.  he would be happy to hoard all his poop.  the stress of the past few weeks and the upcoming few weeks had just gotten to me and you know what it felt good to take that shovel and load it full of all that crap and throw it out. I tried to load the shovel full, you know so I could take that one good hard toss and they all would be gone, but I couldn't get all of them on the shovel at the same time.  As soon as I would get one turd on there another one would roll off...then I would try it again...i eventually had to use brandons boot.  anyways, the lot is clean for now...but this is just so true to my life.

I like to hoard my "crap" as well.  I carry around to many worries and stresses that Jesus says I don't have to, His yolk is easy and his burden is light.
It is sorta distressing when I do have to give them up, but peaceful at the same time. 
And also I tend to pile more on my "shovel" than I can hold....when I add one thing to my plate something else falls off. 
Also its a continual process- My heart and mind will continue to cloud back up with dates, events, errands, worries, and I will have to constantly remember to let go of them Just as the lot needs to be cleaned out

 peace and pork chop grease.
lb

mother MAY I?

Alright...I am sitting here looking at my calendar and just wonder how fast May is going to fly  by.  Already it is pencilled in with severeal events, appointments, pictures, and other fun stuff.  Our vacation is the first week in June, so I think if I can survive the next few weeks I know there will be solace near.  haha. 

here is an update on our house....

We have a a walk in shower and a tub in....and hopefully the plumbers and electricians will come shortly to finish there rough work.  Windows and doors are to come in the end of the week.

I go for an eye appointment friday I am eating carrots all week haha.

Thursday is Lynn Appreciation Day...which is a holiday that B created the first year we dated and it has been an official holiday ever since. 

I register for photography classes this month which I am really excited about.  I have had and have some future photo sessions here lately....I am ready for school so I can learn the technical part of photography.  Here is a few from a session I had this past week. 

this past weekend I went to the Liberty Antiques Festival...i found some pretty cool finds and cannot wait to get them in the new house....I did have a porta John run in (didn't want to touch the door latch which I didn't think would be a problem since there was a long line of people behind me so I thought they would know it was occupied--nope a man opened the door in which I screamed...) I had a bandana to keep my hair back...so i made it to cover my nose too which caught peoples eye as I ran out of the porta john.  The lady in front of me said she sanitized the seat and I may want to too- I am not touching anything in that thing...much less spend my day sanitizing a porta john cmon what a lost cause....and I got a really REALLY bad sunburn from the day too that I could have went without (one little girl in childrens church asked how my hair and my skin was turned pink She thought the pink streaks in my hair were sunburn haha) but it was fun spending the day with my B and our friends we have to schedule out months in advace to see....Carrie and Randy.


Mothers Day is fastly approaching....I am very fortunate to have a wonderful mommy and mother in law!  Happy Mothers Week ladies!